Empty Nest Syndrome - Sure fire cure.

If you are a parent, a truly loving parent, eventually you will have to go through the dreaded "Empty Nest Syndrome". It can be so damn depressing. We parent(s) realize that there isn't a brake pedal to life. We blinked, they were pottied trained, went to school, and off to the world. What do we do now? 

According to the Bible, "The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.' For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were bother naked and were not ashamed...." (Genesis 2.23-25)

What is the old Cole Porter song Let's do it: "Birds do it, bees do it, even educated fleas do it...." It is natural for the cub, fold, litter, offspring, calf, etc., to leave the comforts of home and go out on their own. I am not sure if it is any easier for the animals in the wild, but for us humans it is the most dreaded thing especially when a parent(s) get on up into the senior years. Heck fire! We are happy just to wake up every morning.  It is a really big change for the children to leave home. 

What Mommy's or Daddy's may think but never tell you....

My youngest, my daughter moved out first. I hated the man who put his hands on my innocent little girl. My precious sweet angelic child. Look at that pervert putting his hands on my little apple dumpling. Her bed time is 9:00 PM and he keeps her out to all hours of the night. She is just a little girl! 

Now, my oldest, my big guy, my first born, is leaving home. Damn girl, she took my baby from me. She don't know how to take care of him when he is sick and needing his Mommy! Bet you that think has germs? She won't know about his red cheeks and ears when he gets sick. He forgets his chores when he is with her. It is all her fault, everything, He is just a little boy!

Parent(s)

The house is empty and they are gone. Will they return? You still don't totally like their choices in mates. How dare they grow up! 

Reality Check

Does this sound all too familiar. We the loving parents have always taken the front seat with our children. We are truly (unless you are a really, really terrible parents) are their heroes. We are lost. They are not here. They don't call us. After all we are getting older. Frailty can set in any minute. We can fall and no one will be here to help us. We can cry and not worry about hiding it because we are all alone We feel empty. 

The Solution-The sure fire cure. 

Time to turn them lose. Make the little money grubbing brats call you everyday at least once or a maximum of twice. Make them promise. This was a suggestion that was given to my by my aunt. I have my daughter trained. But now, male children need a little bit more working with to contact. It must be a macho thing? 

I told them both that I am not angry with perspective mates, it is the fact I am angry at the child for growing up and leaving me. I don't feel that they love us anymore or need us or even want to be around us. Well that is not true. They do love us, They do care about us. They do need us in their lives. But, an easy sure fire method that help eases the tension, the loneliness, and the painful depression of missing that offspring is a simple text message or a telephone call. Just hearing that voice on a daily basis helps more than you can possibly know. Just for them to ask you, "How are you feeling Mom?" or "Hey we are going to be out of pocket for the weekend, but I will call you still" or "I think I will come see you today, is that okay with you? Do you have plans or do you need me to pick something up for you?"  

Just hearing these simple things warms a parent's heart to no end. It keeps the communication open and the dialogue going between parents and children. Yet, you don't have to know every aspect of their lives. On the other hand, they need to know about you.  You then are getting to know your children on another level besides parent and child. Talk to your children, if you are like me with multiple health issues, to let their mates need know what your parents are going through medically. 

It has taken me three years to really appreciate my son-in-law. My new soon to be daughter-in-law well we are learning.  There will be ups and downs with the in-laws, but we will all eventually drawn boundaries of what is and is not acceptable.  Boundaries are like holidays. My favorite holiday is Thanksgiving.  That is mandatory. Last years was absolutely fantastic. Christmas is more religious, and basically for children. I have two grandchildren now, I will see them Christmas Eve or Christmas night. New Years, I sleep through it as usual. Halloween, I enjoy the costumes of the children and always try to pass out candy safely. 

The bottom line to the cure, communication. At least one text message or telephone call per day keeps the parent(s) happy and helps ward off the empty nest syndrome. 

Robert and Liz ... Drue, Brayan and their children ......  Mommy (Julia) aka Gammy loves you all.